Big bro,
When you were talking about your birthday yesterday I was reminded of a story I heard from a friend about his recent trip to India. He came across a little village boy and asked him his age. The boy (who looked about 10 years old) started laughing and said: “i dont know…maybe 15 or 20?” He did not know, and he cared very little, to the point of amusement at the very question.
You know how we have to think back to remember ages sometimes? Even our own on occasion. “How old am I anyway?” you think to yourself, when asked the question. You know its around, say, mid twenties, but not sure exactly. “Lets see, last year I was 23, and then I remember turning twenty-four..ah, yes, I’m twenty-four,” you think to yourself in about 1.25 seconds.
What if we didn’t commemorate that age milestone?
Remember how yiayia ['grandmother' in Greek] told us that back in her day birthdays were no big deal…it was the _nameday_ that was meaningful. Maybe because names have some meaning! Most often when names are conferred — at birth, at baptism, during a time of spiritual awakening, etc — there is some meaning behind it. My name, for example, means “bearer of christ” right? Well, I’m not sure about those who conferred it, but it has meaning for me. What a legacy I carry in my name…sharing it with the man who helped Jesus carry the cross when he was stumbling just to get up the hill so he could then bear his crucifixion. Or, another interpretation, bearer of the /quality/ of Christ, the divine or anointed nature, which dwells within each of us and can govern a life of harmony with natural/divine law. I mean, what a legacy for a name.
But age? What does this mean? We having coming of ages, we have stereotypes with certain ages (e.g. The big three-oh means you’re starting to get old! Or is it the big three-five?) But are those fabricated meanings _useful_? Or even welcome?
The question arises: Is it possible to shed the annual life-milestone of age? We ourselves know people who have done it temporarily, and perhaps not so intentionally, it is not hard to find such cases. The most delightful case, in my mind, is that of
Peace Pilgrim. When asked her age she responds:
“Along my pilgrimage route many people would ask my age. I told them I did not know my age and I did not intend to figure it out. I know my birth date. It lingers at the fringes of my memory, but I wont divulge it. What purpose would it serve? [...] I’m very thankful that age is now out of my mind. As long as I counted birthdays and started thinking about getting older, I did get older. Age is a state of mind, and I think of myself as ageless. And that’s my advice to others. Get to be as old as you want to be and then stop creating age.”
“I never give out my zodiac sign either. Do you honestly think I can be pushed around by a planet? Good heavens, your divine nature is always free — it’s only your self-centered nature that is not free. I have two reasons for not giving out my sign. One is that some enterprising astrologer might figure out a horoscope on me, and what a waste of time that would be. And if my birth time were known I would be deluged by birthday cards just as I am deluged with Christmas cards now, and I would have to take another two weeks off each year to answer them.” [from "Peace Pilgrim: Her Life and Work in Her Own Words"]
How practical and wise this woman was! (Indeed practicality and true wisdom go hand-in-hand, I am finding)
And so what shall I say to you you for this day we call birthday? How about: 1) I am glad you were born, and furthermore that we were born as brothers — because you have taught me a lot throughout my life, and still do; you have helped out quite selflessly on many occasions; you have listened to me when it seemed no one else was; indeed I certainly would not be all of who I am today and who I am becoming tomorrow were it not for you. So for that, for you, I am grateful; and 2) Congratulations on another lap around the sun! As the saying goes: “the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.” Keep on traveling around the sun! At your own pace, and with (or without!) whatever measurements you choose to be meaningful to you, of course : )
With much brotherly love,
Christopher
